For the past six months, I’ve been deep in a process of self-reflection. Friends like to joke that it sounds like a mid-life crisis: twenty-some years of purpose, validation, and achievement, only for those feelings to start fading around the edges. Time has a way of reshaping our priorities, shifting what we value, and blurring the sense of meaning that once came easily. Moving to Barcelona accelerated that process. Many of my old comforts fell away, replaced with doubts and a shaky sense of self, and the familiar safety net of friends and loved ones felt thinner.
Some of this is beyond my control. I didn’t choose to lose my creative spark or to land in a city that sometimes lacks consistent cultural stimulation. But much of it is on me. Over these past months, I’ve realized how often I hold myself back. The fears I’m confronting aren’t new, yet they’ve shaped a lot my life recently, keeping me from fully being myself and, I suspect, from finding lasting happiness.
That’s why I’m so excited to introduce Horstman. It’s a studio rooted in the art of curation, seeking out distinctive destinations and shaping spaces where people can gather, reflect, and enjoy. This is where the path starts: sharing my passions and my work, including things like city guides that highlight the character and culture of urban life, and eventually, cafés, restaurants, and places that embody these curatorial values. The idea is simple: start small, grow meaningfully, and create the kinds of places I want to be.
A big part of this transition is sunsetting The Fox Is Black. Mentally and spiritually, I need a clear line between these projects. In some ways, it has started to feel like creative baggage, something I can’t quite move past. Starting fresh gives me permission to experiment with new forms, such as pop-ups, dinner parties, and other experiences that never quite fit under the TFIB umbrella.
For those curious, Horstman is my grandmother’s maiden name. It’s a Dutch surname derived from farms called Ter Horst, meaning “at the wooded rise.” The root words, horst (a wooded hill or thicket) and man (“man”), once described someone who lived near such a place. I love how it feels unique, a bit unusual, and slightly mysterious. I hope it sparks curiosity for others as well.
Ultimately, I’m treating this project like a plant, something to nurture with care and light so it can grow strong and healthy. The image above Rabbits Between the Staves, inspired today’s title. It reminds me to savor the moments between the notes and to find joy in simply being part of something larger than myself. Thank you to everyone who’s listened and encouraged me over these past year months.
As an FYI, the first real newsletter will be sent Saturday, February 28, with a snapshot of all things inspiring me currently and that are overall noteworthy. This will follow a two week cadence, with an update on Paris and a tour of what I see at the upcoming Matter & Shape design fair on March 14. For more daily thoughts and ideas, feel free to follow the Horstman Instagram which I pepper with all kinds of interesting items. Finally, thank you dear reader for being part of this journey. Some of you have been reading what I share for a very long time now and it brings me such an incredible feeling. To continuing down the path!